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DIME OR QUARTER
A businessman was talking with his barber, when they both noticed a goofy-looking fellow bouncing down the sidewalk. The barber whispered, "That's Tommy, one of the stupidest kids you'll ever meet. "Here, I'll show you." "Hey Tommy! Come here!" yelled the barber. Tommy came bouncing over. "Hi, Mr. Williams!" The barber pulled out a rusty dime and a shiny quarter and told Tommy he could keep the one of his choice. Tommy looked long and hard at the dime and quarter and then quickly snapped the dime from the barber's hand. The barber looked at the businessman and said, "See, I told you." After his haircut, the businessman caught up with Tommy down the street and asked him why he chose the dime. Tommy looked at him in the eye and said, "If I take the quarter, the game is over."

LOST CIGARETTES
A carpet layer had worked all day installing wall-to-wall carpeting. When he noticed a lump under the carpet in the middle of the living room, he felt his shirt pocket for his cigarettes--they were gone. He was not about to pull the carpet back up, so he went outside for a two-by-four. Stamping down cigarettes with it would be easy. Once the lump was smoothed, the man gathered up his tools and carried them to his truck. Then two things happened simultaneously. He saw his cigarettes on the seat of the truck, and over his shoulder he heard the voice of the woman to whom the carpet belonged. "Have you seen anything of my parakeet?" she asked plaintively.

OVER THE P.A. SYSTEM
After a long, bumpy flight, the passengers of a commercial flight were glad to finally land and disembark. The attendants discovered that one of the passengers had left something behind. A bag of homemade cookies with a note saying "Much love, Mom" was found under one of the seats. The bag was sent to the gate agent in hopes it would be reunited with its owner. In few minutes, an announcement came over the public address system in the concourse: "Would the passenger who lost his cookies on Flight 502, please return to the gate?"

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