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So much strange news, so little time. Oh, who are you kidding, you have plenty of time...so read on.


Not one of the actual suspended priests. Probably.

ROMANIAN PRIESTS SUSPENDED FOR BLESSING BROTHELS
(Romania) - Romania's Orthodox Church suspended 10 Bucharest priests who were filmed blessing brothels, porn shops and a weapons store in exchange for money and goods. It is traditional for Orthodox priests to bless homes, offices, cars and gardens to ward off the devil. But priests are not allowed to bless places deemed unholy, such as brothels and abortion clinics.

INJURED DOG FINDS WAY TO HOSPITAL
(West Virginia, AP) - It was canine intuition when an injured black Labrador retriever did a good job of finding medical attention. The dog, apparently struck by a car, found his way to Beckley Appalachian Regional Hospital in West Virginia and hobbled through the hospital's sliding glass doors and waited for assistance in the hallway. "It's the darndest thing," said Ted Weigel, marketing director at Beckley. "The dog limped in and laid down where people could see it. It seemed to know exactly where to go for help." Hospital workers gave the dog water, called a veterinarian and offered to pay the bill. "There's no way they were going to put an injured animal back on the street," Weigel said. Dr. Roger Ward treated the animal, and the vet said the canine suffered road burns, scrapes and an infected wound on his leg. The 7-year-old male dog has been a model patient, Ward said. Hospital officials are searching for the dog's owner.

RESEARCHERS SAY STONEHENGE DEPICTS FEMALE GENITALIA
(England) - Stonehenge is a massive fertility symbol, according to Canadian researchers who believe they have finally cracked the mystery of the ancient monument in southern England. In the arrangement of the stones, the researchers say they have spotted the original design: female genitalia. The theory is laid out in a paper entitled "Stonehenge: A View from Medicine" in Britain's Journal of the Royal Society of Medicine. "To the builders of the henge, the most critical events in life were birth and death," Anthony Perks, a retired professor of obstetrics and gynecology at the University of British Columbia, writes. Viewed from above, Perks suggests Stonehenge's inner bluestone circle represents the labia minora and the giant outer sarsen stone circle is the labia majora. He says the altar stone could be the clitoris and the open center the birth canal. "Could the outer avenue of Stonehenge represent the way by which new life entered?" the article wonders, adding that when comparing "the layout of the henge with the anatomy of the human vulva, there is a distinct similarity."

LIKE FATHER, LIKE SON AS POLICE NAB DRUNK DRIVERS
(Germany, Reuters) - A German father and son lost their driving licenses within hours of each other for being drunk at the wheel, after the son got caught and the inebriated father went to pick him up, police have said. "First the son came off the road under the influence, so police took his license. Then the father set off for the scene of the accident, got stopped and was also found to be over the limit, so he had his taken too," said a police spokesman in the southern town of Hildesheim.

ELEPHANT LOGO CRITICIZED FOR LACK OF CONDOM
(Thailand, Reuters) - Thai community groups want to use a logo featuring two elephants having sex for next year's World AIDS conference in Bangkok but the plan has been criticized by health authorities because the bull is not using a condom. "The logo fails to convey any meaning," Dr. Sombat Tanprasertsuk of the Thai government's disease control department was quoted as saying in the Nation newspaper. "There is only one message which people will get: that community workers are obsessed with sex. And it doesn't show the male elephant wearing a condom." The official logo for the meeting depicts three elephants standing in line. Elephants are Thailand's national symbol.

CAMEROON BANS URINE HEALTH DRINK
(Cameroon) - The Cameroon health minister has deemed it necessary to warn people that drinking urine may not be good for their health. Urbain Olanguena Awono has even warned that those who advocate drinking urine risk prosecution. He was moved to speak after a wave of interest in "urinotherapy." Advocates are convinced that it can cure afflictions such as hemorrhoids, ulcers, infertility and even snakebites. "Given the risks of toxicity associated in the short, medium and long term with ingesting urine, the health ministry advises against the consumption of urine and invites those who promote the practice to cease doing so forthwith or risk prosecution," Awono said in a statement. But "urinotherapists" are sticking to their beliefs that a glass of urine a day keeps the doctor away. "I used it to treat my hemorrhoids," Emile told Cameroon newspaper, Le Messager. "Everyone uses it in secret. But you need to be brave," he said.

MUNCH EXHIBIT OPENS IN DARKNESS
(Norway) - A large collection of graphics by the painter Edvard Munch is on show in Norway in a room with no lighting. The audience has to use torches to see anything at all. Most people do not expect to walk into a completely dark room when attending the opening of an art exhibition. But the Stenersen Museum in Oslo decided that this was indeed the only way of showing painter Edward Munch's graphics collection. Perhaps Norway's most famous export with his painting The Scream, instantly recognizable around the world, Edvard Munch did not care much for choosing high quality paper for the graphic versions of his work. Exposed to normal lighting, they will discolor and fade, hence the torches. But the audiences said the special viewing conditions added to the experience of studying the pictures, making it more of an exploration than a regular viewing.

HARDY EATERS DEVOUR MOUNTAIN OYSTERS
(Nevada) - Flocking to the recent 12th annual Mountain Oyster Fry, also known as the "Testicle Festival," people tasted mountain oysters, also known as sheep testicles, from 14 vendors. Motorists driving along C Street in Virginia City, Nevada to the Bucket of Blood Saloon were greeted by a sign, "The Mountain Oyster Fry: Have a Ball." Reno resident Paul Rasmussen, 62, said he's been eating them, along with cow and hog testicles, for at least 50 years and has attended the event every year since moving to the area. Rasmussen said he talked his 57-year-old wife, Pearl, into trying them two years ago after she'd drank a half bottle of wine. "She's from Boston. She thought I was crazy," Rasmussen said. "Now I can't keep her away from them."

CHILD HURT AS MAN LOBS COMPUTER FROM APARTMENT
(Korea, Reuters) - A South Korean man angry with his daughter's Web surfing faced possible charges after he threw a computer monitor out of his 12th-floor apartment, hitting a four-year-old girl below on the head, police said. A police official said the man, 49-year-old Park Yong-ju, had got angry when he returned to his home in Seoul. His 20-year-old daughter was playing an online computer game and failed to greet him, as Korean custom requires. When she declined to let him join the game, he grabbed the monitor and flung it through the balcony window, the official said. The screen hit four-year-old Han Jung-in, causing severe facial injuries but no brain damage, a hospital official said. The girl was in a stable condition.

SWAZI KING BLAMES TROUSERS FOR WORLD'S ILLS
(Swaziland, Reuters) - Swaziland's absolute monarch has singled out women wearing trousers as the cause of the world's ills in a state radio sermon that also condemned human rights as an "abomination before God." "The Bible says curse be unto a woman who wears pants, and those who wear their husband's clothes. That is why the world is in such a state today," Mswati, ruler of the impoverished feudal nation of about one million, said. The Times of Swaziland reported that the monarch, who reigns supreme in the landlocked country run by palace appointees and where opposition parties are banned, went on to criticize the human rights movement. "What rights? God created people, and He gave them their roles in society. You cannot change what God has created. This is an abomination before God," the king said. Women on the streets of capital Mbabane were not impressed. "The king says I am the cause of the world's problems because of my outfit. Never mind terrorism, government corruption, poverty and disease, it's me and my pants. I reject that," said Thob'sile Dlamini.

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