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The more strange news the better, we say!


Not the actual medical mocker.

DOCTOR ALLEGEDLY MOCKED OBESE WOMAN
(New Hampshire) - A doctor allegedly told a patient she is so fat she might only be attractive to black men. He also allegedly advised another to shoot herself to end her suffering after brain surgery. Rude and offensive? Yes, said a New Hampshire judge. But worthy of discipline from the New Hampshire Board of Medicine? No, the judge ruled in ordering the board to stop disciplinary proceedings against Dr. Terry Bennett. The judge made clear that while he doesn't condone the remarks, Bennett has the right to speak bluntly to patients. Bennett has denied telling the woman she was so obese that few men would find her attractive, but he said he has seen polls that support the notion that black men like fat women. Bennett said he plans to sue everyone involved for malicious prosecution. The state is considering an appeal.

MALAYSIA DRAWS UP LIST OF UNSUITABLE NAMES FOR CHILDREN
(Malaysia, AFP) - Malaysian parents will no longer be allowed to give their children names deemed unsuitable by authorities, a report says. According to the New Straits Times, the National Registration Department will not allow names with undesirable meanings in the languages used by the country's three main ethnic groups. Department spokesperson Jainisah Mohd Noor was quoted by the newspaper as saying the list was compiled following input from various religious and cultural groups. "We are just helping to disseminate the information we have," Jainisah said. Among the Malays, names such as Zani, which means "male adulterer," and Woti, meaning "sexual intercourse," were banned, the report said. For Indians, Karrupan, which means "black fellow," is equally as taboo as are names that denote "fair skin," such as Sivappi and Vellayan. Jainisah said parents could not name their babies after colors, animals, insects, fruits or vegetables. In the past, some in the Chinese community gave their children inauspicious names believing it would ward off evil spirits and bad luck. Now, names such as Ah Kow, "dog" in the Cantonese dialect, or Ah Gong, meaning "unsound mind," are prohibited. Other Chinese names on the banned list included Chow Tow and Sum Seng that mean "smelly head" and "gangster," respectively.

SPOKANE PARKS MARRED BY LITTER FROM PUBLIC SEX
(Washington, AP) - Litter from sexual activity is unpleasantly evident in High Bridge and People's parks, reflecting years of lewd conduct in the open air, police and park officials say. Discarded underwear, lubrication packets and condoms are regularly found in the bushes, and Officer Jennifer DeRuwe says police have received a growing number of complaints. "It's just kind of one of those knowns in Spokane," DeRuwe said. "We've been aware of it for a number of years," said Mike Stone, city parks and recreation director. Ruby La Fleur, 62, a longtime resident near High Bridge, is offended nonetheless. "I have grandkids up here," La Fleur said. "I don't want them walking through the bushes, saying 'Grandma Ruby, what's that toilet paper? What are those rubber gloves for? What are those pictures?"' In the past five years police have gotten 27 calls involving lewd conduct and 30 about suspicious people in vehicles. City Council member Bob Apple said police are stretched thin. "I would rather they show up to the burglary or the probable theft than to an instance of consensual sex in a public place," Apple said. "I, like most people, find it disgusting, but what do you do?"

MAN FIRED FOR SLEEPING DURING SLEEP STUDY
Daniel Ayers of Sioux City was fired recently from Somnitech, where he worked as a full-time sleep technician, preparing clients for a sleep study and then monitoring them as they slept. He was fired for sleeping on the job on three occasions. During one incident, a co-worker allegedly used her cell phone to photograph Ayers sleeping at work.

FLAMING DOG MEAT SETS CHINESE SCHOOL AFIRE
(China, Reuters) - A Chinese headmaster, who tried to buy off colleagues by cooking dog meat for them after secretly selling off trees around the school, ended up setting fire to classrooms when the meal burst into flames, a Chinese newspaper said. Ten classrooms containing televisions, computers, printers and textbooks burned down, leaving nearly 100 children unable to go to school, the Beijing Youth Daily said. The headmaster, in the northeastern province of Heilongjiang, sold off a 1,000-tree arboretum surrounding the school on the sly, the newspaper said. "In order to get the teachers not to tell anyone what he had done, headmaster Meng got friends to obtain two dogs, which they proceeded to kill on the school grounds," the report said. "He then told the teachers they would have dog meat to eat that afternoon," it added. But the plan went awry when the dog being baked burst into flames and set fire to the school's main office and then the classrooms.

YOUNG MAN SURVIVES RAVINE PLUNGE
(Australia) - An Australian man is recovering from a close brush with death after surviving a fall of nearly 100 feet into a ravine in East Vancouver. The man, who had been drinking, climbed up onto a railing over the ravine near the Commercial Drive SkyTrain station, apparently looking for somewhere to relieve himself. "I guess he was really drunk," said one witness. "He tried to grab on to the tree there, to climb down, and he fell all the way to the bottom." Emergency officials say the man broke at least one bone, but will be OK, as branches slowed his fall. Vancouver fire department Capt. Rick Matsen says it was obvious the man had been drinking until just moments before his fall. "Well, it just so happens he had a beer with him when he was brought up," he said. "Still in his hands?" asked a reporter. "Still in his hands, yup. He held on to it pretty tight, I'm thinking," said Matsen.

DOZENS OF Rs STOLEN FROM SIGNS AROUND TOWN
(Indiana, AP) - A consonant-loving thief has police and business owners baffled after dozens of Rs were stolen from signs around the community. "We've lost our Rs. And we want them back," said Randall Jones, president of Headley Hardware. The weekend caper targeted gas stations, restaurants, repair shops and medical offices in the city of 10,000 people about 40 miles west of Indianapolis. The thief also nabbed half a dozen letters from a lighted marquee in front of a National Guard post. "I don't know if they think it's a joke, but to me it's just theft," said National Guard Sgt. Robert Lamb. "I just think it's disturbing." Putnam Inn manager Jane Hansen isn't sure how the thief climbed more than six feet off the ground to take Rs from a sign in front of her motel. "Whoever's doing it needs to put their talents to something more constructive," she said. Greencastle Police said they've been notified about the stolen letters, but many business owners are choosing not to file reports.

HOT DOG MAILED BACK AND FORTH FOR MORE THAN 50 YEARS
(Colorado) - Flora Zimbelman says it all started 54 years ago when she put an uncooked hot dog in her sister's suitcase. "I don't know what made me do it. The devil I guess," she said. Flora's sister, Rose, found the hot dog when she opened the suitcase back up in Idaho, where she lived at the time. "She mailed it back to me telling me to keep my garbage at home," said Flora. The game was on. In the years that followed, Flora would find a way to sneak the hot dog back into Rose's life. And Rose would find another way to sneak it back to Flora. "I found it under my pillow once, I found it in between the drapes and once I found it in the kitchen drawer," said Flora. Flora still has that hot dog. It looks just about as disgusting as you might expect. Earlier this year, Flora's sister, best friend, and victim of her continuous pranks, lost her battle with cancer. Flora says she misses her friend, and even though it's difficult to look at, she'll still show you the hot dog and tell you the story behind it.

PETE COORS ARRESTED FOR DUI
(Colorado) - Pete Coors, vice chairman one of the world's largest beer brewing companies, was arrested in Colorado on a drunken driving charge, according to the Rocky Mountain News. Coors was pulled over by the Colorado State Patrol and was cited for driving under the influence, registering a high blood-alcohol level and failing to obey a traffic device, according to court records. In a statement released by Pete Coors, he said, "I made a mistake by driving myself home after a friend's wedding celebration. I should have planned ahead for a ride. For years I've advocated the responsible use of our company's products. That's still my message, and our company's message, and it's the right message. I am sorry that I didn't follow it myself."

OPERATION REMOVES LIGHTBULB FROM ANUS
(Pakistan, Reuters) - Fateh Mohammad, a prison inmate in Pakistan, says he woke up recently with a glass lightbulb in his anus. Doctors brought Mohammad's misery to an end after a one-and-a-half hour operation to remove the object. "Thanks, Allah, now I feel comfort. Today, I had my breakfast. I was just drinking water, nothing else," Mohammad, a gray-bearded man in his mid-40s, told Reuters from a hospital bed in the southern central city of Multan. "We had to take it out intact," said Dr. Farrukh Aftab at Nishtar Hospital. "Had it been broken inside, it would be a very, very complicated situation." Mohammad, who is serving a four-year sentence for making liquor, prohibited for Muslims, said he was shocked when he was first told the cause of his discomfort. He swears he didn't know the bulb was there. "When I woke up I felt a pain in my lower abdomen, but later in hospital, they told me this," Mohammad said. "I don't know who did this to me. Police or other prisoners." The doctor treating Mohammad said he'd never encountered anything like it before, and doubted the felon's story that someone had drugged him and inserted the bulb while he was comatose.

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